united sorry

i am in Paris, preparing five projects in the same time, and to be honest i like it. I really feel confident about everything in the future. A dangerous feeling, but perhaps it is just the start of the spring, what makes me like this. i have the feeling i can start again, with new energy, new ideas, and instead of imagining my work as a tree that grows, i suddenly see my work as grass, a landscape of grass, which you hardly see growing, but it grows all the time. where does this idea of growth come from? why do people , and certainly i , always have this desire that we our growing, that our live isn’t in a stagnation. After the piece in leipzig, something changed in my mind, the process of dying seems to be out of my system, i died already so many times on stage, and now suddenly i want to flourish, play, show a lot of different colours, energies, contrasts, life energy as pure as it can be.

i bought in vienna the catalogue of paul thek, but immediately gave it to a dear friend, who reminds me a lot of him, then i was in amsterdam, but the catalogue was sold out totally, i heard the book was 20 euro’s more expensive than in vienna, than i went to the centre pompidou bookstore, i stood thrity minutes in line to get into the building, then they had only one item, the clients item to watch it, so it was already in a bad condition, but i bought it, because i already started reading it in vienna, and it was now thrity euro’s more expensive than in vienna. but i am happy reading it now.

thirty minutes on line in a starbucks coffeeshop, just to check the necessary emails, my back starts to hurt of carrying the laptop to everywhere, i will go to the calder exhibition now, and enjoy an afternoon of.