united sorry

last week my bag was stolen  in the train to bruxelles. so i lost my laptop, all my personal notebooks, traintickets for the next day, etc. it was one day before my birthday and i decided to see it as a new beginning. i decided to start a analogue life again and bought two new notebooks, one for work, other for private thoughts. of course there is hardly a difference between what i write in these two notebooks. because what is a private life, when you are constantly travelling fom one city to another city.

now i am in graz, working on a project in the mountains. my investigation is the human connection with nature, so, the closest i can get to nature myself,  is to observe my connection with my own body and mind. but who is this I which refers  to the word “my” in “my connection with my own body and mind”. is this notion of I not a part of nature itself, i wonder. i think that everything that manifests itself in the material and the immaterial way is a manifestation of how nature functions. so  i start to think that my search for connection becomes a getting rid of a strong notion of  the I as an isolated entity towards the notion of nature.

in my collaboration with the actors of Theater im Bahnhof i must work of diminishing this notion of I, this strategy i already investgated in my duet with Maria Hassabi. How to be present in the body and at the same time become a vanishing point of the I, who seperates itself from the other.

in an ecstatic mood, where everything is experienced as one, there is no need for connection.So am i working on an ecstatic performance and shall “I” cope with the xtc of silence in this project. I do hope so. i feel ready, to face the mountains.